Sunday, January 9, 2011

Can't we get past all this? Or...

You know it's bad when you start loosing your followers. It's even worse when you only had three to begin with.

Right now the weight of the world is on my shoulders. I'm a fucking nervous wreck.
I can't focus.
I can't eat.
Most importantly I can't write. I'm a nervous fucking wreck and it's causing me to have writers block.
On Thursday morning to my surprise I finally had followers. You know that knot you get in your stomach?
Not the bad one.
The good one.
The one where it feels like Shyanne Tibbets thinks your ass looks good and you have a chance to fuck her.
That one.
And if you don't know Shyanne Tibbets just think of someone.
Anyone
Maybe a Celebrity
So, Thursday morning, to my surprise, I finally had followers.
For twenty minutes I sat there staring at my computer screen.
I thought, "This is fucking awesome!" Then I couldn't think of anything at all.
Whatsoever
Nada
Zip
Fucking Zilch
I'm a nervous fucking wreck and I cant' think of anything to write.
You know those Television Shows? The ones where they plan re-runs half way through the season in hopes to catch the attention of new viewers?
That was my inspiration
So I posted an old post
It was shit
It still is
Shit

I thought the residents of Tooele County would provide some inspiration.
I mean, after all, I have followers. My next post has to be something worth reading. I have followers. Three of them.
It should be four.
Pearl suggested I add a "follower" widget to my blog soes she could follow me.
So I did
I don't think she ever came back. I do thank her for the kind words.
By the way
Her blog is fucking awesome

In the Tooele County Library at computer number 6 I see him. It's the first time he's been here since the New Year started.
"Can I get my own library card." Joey says.
Joey's head barely reaches over the top of the internet reception desk.
To avoid mutual eye contact my head slides down six inches. I cower behind the sixteen-inch flat screen of computer number six.
"You have to be at least 18" the receptionist says
My head reaches out from behind the monitor to get a better look.
Joey stands there. Lifeless.
He stands there lifeless with no expression on his face whatsoever.
"So...are you 18?" the receptionist asks
Joey stands his ground. Same look. Same expression.
"Do your parents have one.”? The receptionist says " Because if they do, then you should be able..."
"But I want my OWN library card."
"Are you 18? 'Cause you don't look 18"
There have been times where I have seen people avoid an implicating question by using numerous variable tactics.
But silence?
This kid is good.
Really good.
"Do you have any sort of I.D.?"
"I just want my own library card." Joey says
Joey stands his ground. At only ten years old he stands his ground. This cold, expressionless cool as cu-fucking-cumber look is genius.
The receptionist picks the hand piece up to his phone. Over the loud speaker we hear
"Aaron, please come to the internet desk please."
Maybe the receptionist has reached her end game. She's tired of fucking around and ready to deal the game-ending blow.
Security is on their way Joey. You've done well for yourself but the game has to end eventually.
An overweight, Forty-something year old approaches the desk. I think it's Aaron.
The receptionist and Aaron form a huddle.
They whisper
Make gestures with their hands
Shake their heads.
Aaron leaves
"Sorry little fellow" the receptionist says, "My boss tells me there's nothing I can do. You have to be at least 18 to have your own library card."
Not response I was expecting but the outcome appears the same.
"Why?"
Pause
Joey stares down
Stands his ground
Doesn't even seemed phased
"That's just our policy." The receptionist says
"But why?"
Joey is making his comeback.
He stands his ground and makes his comeback.
"I don't know, it just is."
Expressionless
Blank
Cold
Unforgiving
The receptionist sighs.
He looks beat
Defeated
"Okay...how 'bout this..." he says "...

Anyone in Hollywood will tell you, the secret to a long standing Television Series is continuity.
Have a recurring theme. Pick up where the last episode leaves off.
If you look at the Nielsen ratings for the past 12 months, those shows, the ones with continuity, they are in top.
Good ahead look it up.

7 comments:

Elaina Wicks said...

Nah...you didn't lose a follower, my PC was brain farting yesterday and I screwed a few things up. I responded to your comment on my blog! Keep your chin up, great blog!

~Elaina

Agentblue24 said...

For some time there wasn't an option to follow. I looked several times. Better late than never

Pearl said...

Silly person!

Thanks for the mention -- and you keep writing, you're going to have followers.

Don't worry about writer's block -- I suspect you have many opinions, some perhaps even conflicting with previously held opinions. :-) Why in the world would you ever run out of something to say?

I ask you!

Pearl

Elaina Wicks said...

People can "follow" from the upper tab on the top of the webpage...i.e., Follow, Report, Next Blog, etc. There's no need for the widget.

Hawkluke said...

Hey Dub.. I have followed you to the depths of some crazy shit! So following your blog is easy and actually quite enjoyable. I know Shyanne Tibbits.. Hells yeah I would have boned her.. She really shoulda put em on the glass at the lock in.. That would have put the icing on my senior cake! These fine people would prolly love a good ol flash back of the JW incident.. The day your ol man suggested you guys smoke a carton of cigs to kick your habbit.. Or maybe even the day you ran out of gas takin Lindsay Baker home from the date.. You have so much REAL shit to write about.. Let it lose man!

Annah said...

Just keep at it... The followers will come.

Maybe this helps you. Or not.
http://www.whenredmeansgo.com/2010/07/how-to-get-followers-and-lose-them-too.html

Captain Dumbass said...

Now you have another.

And 18? My five year old has his own library card.